Rant-O-Matic: Paul Vitti for President
Don't get me wrong. George Bush is a decent enough chap. Maybe not the brightest President we've ever known, but let's give the guy credit for his focus. You may disagree, but considering the alternative and the bad times we're in, he was the right guy for a really tough, lousy job.
But if I had to vote today, I know who my candidate would be: Paul Vitti, the lead charactor in Analyze This.
Let me explain. George has his shorts in a knot about Saddam. That's good. But with George, it's personal. And that's bad. After all, Saddam tried to whack his dad. And that's really, really bad. It's just that the way George the younger is going about things makes me wonder. With all the sabre rattling that George and his conservative buddies are doing, you tend to leave out the element of surprise. And last I checked, that's pretty important if you're going to start a war.
In this case, I don't recommend that. Starting a war is not what Americans do best. We fight best when we have a cause. Pundits refer to that as political will. Simply put, drop a bomb on me and see what happens. That is when Americans win. Because in the end, it's not just the weapons of war and armies that you assemble that decides the destiny of human conflict. It's the political will to win the most unthinkable of endeavors.
Frankly, I'm not concerned about Saddam or whatever weapons he is purported to have. But I am a bit concerned about making all of Islam our enemy. That includes about half the world's population. Not that they don't hate us already. They do. And that's just because we're not them. But that's a subject for another blog.
Back to Paul Vitti. Sure he's neurotic. Yes, he's got issues. And luggage. But what I like about Paul is that he makes life simple. He gets things done. Instead of months of political wrangling, instead of making appearances on Larry King or your favorite telepundit show, instead of trying to assemble an army large enough to fight in The Two Towers, Paul just does one thing.
He calls Jelly.
It could be really simple. No wars. No mess. Just these words:
Paul: "Jelly. Whack him."
Jelly: "Sure, boss."
There. All done. Now, wasn't that simple? Yep. Paul's my man.
Don't get me wrong. George Bush is a decent enough chap. Maybe not the brightest President we've ever known, but let's give the guy credit for his focus. You may disagree, but considering the alternative and the bad times we're in, he was the right guy for a really tough, lousy job.
But if I had to vote today, I know who my candidate would be: Paul Vitti, the lead charactor in Analyze This.
Let me explain. George has his shorts in a knot about Saddam. That's good. But with George, it's personal. And that's bad. After all, Saddam tried to whack his dad. And that's really, really bad. It's just that the way George the younger is going about things makes me wonder. With all the sabre rattling that George and his conservative buddies are doing, you tend to leave out the element of surprise. And last I checked, that's pretty important if you're going to start a war.
In this case, I don't recommend that. Starting a war is not what Americans do best. We fight best when we have a cause. Pundits refer to that as political will. Simply put, drop a bomb on me and see what happens. That is when Americans win. Because in the end, it's not just the weapons of war and armies that you assemble that decides the destiny of human conflict. It's the political will to win the most unthinkable of endeavors.
Frankly, I'm not concerned about Saddam or whatever weapons he is purported to have. But I am a bit concerned about making all of Islam our enemy. That includes about half the world's population. Not that they don't hate us already. They do. And that's just because we're not them. But that's a subject for another blog.
Back to Paul Vitti. Sure he's neurotic. Yes, he's got issues. And luggage. But what I like about Paul is that he makes life simple. He gets things done. Instead of months of political wrangling, instead of making appearances on Larry King or your favorite telepundit show, instead of trying to assemble an army large enough to fight in The Two Towers, Paul just does one thing.
He calls Jelly.
It could be really simple. No wars. No mess. Just these words:
Paul: "Jelly. Whack him."
Jelly: "Sure, boss."
There. All done. Now, wasn't that simple? Yep. Paul's my man.
posted by Brian at
11:03 AM
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